Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Open Me!

Hi there! Open Me!

I am the new musical best seller, The “Everything You Ever Wanted To Say… (But Were Too Polite to Say it)” Pop-Off Book!

Open me to any page, press the button of your choice and hear famous Pop Off’s like: “What part of ‘drop dead’ don’t you get?” or “Go ahead, cry me a river!” Admit it, don’t you wish just once you could Pop-Off to your boss? How about telling off your parents, your boyfriend or landlord? Between my covers are chapters entitled: “Best Pop-Off’s for work and home!”, “Pop-Off’s for all occasions!” and “Pop-Off’s too nasty for words!”

Have you ever been at a loss for a quick, witty comeback? Well, my pages are chock full of them. And every last Pop-Off is delivered in a sweet, musical voice no one can take offense to. Old favorites like: “Because I said so!”, “Kiss my keister!” and “Hey Officer, your fly is open!” Plus hundreds of new Pop-Offs. “Go sit on a stick and swivel!”, “A sniff of glue will do wonders for you!” and “What planet are you from?”

Don’t want to cook for the family tonight? Just open me to page 37! In response to hungry whines, press the “Try a dog biscuit” button. Is there a dumb ass at work who drives you crazy? On page 52, there are dozens of Pop-Offs, nice and otherwise, to put him exactly where you want him. Not just the well loved, “Pull your head out for a change!” but new Pop-Off’s like, “Is there a Black Hole where your heart was?” and “I'll be happy to listen when your brain is back in its pan!”

Yes, a lot can be said with just a few choice words. With me on your coffee table, your family will communicate better. And with shorter sentences! And don’t forget to check your local bookstore for my companion musical Pop-Off book: “Pop-Off’s for the Teen Scene!” And the soon to be released, “Grandma and Grandpa Pop-Offs!”

Think about it. With elections soon and Christmas coming, what better gift of love to give than a musical book full of feel-good Pop-Off's?


  1. Oh, that's just great!
    That is an app waiting to happen!

  2. It would make a great app!! Wish I knew code, I'd make one and get rich!

  3. Thanks Sharon. Gotta smile when life belly punches, right?